Torn Up Inside

I've resurrected to my previous self.....

back to the time when I smile for every negative emotion I have,

but this time is a lil different,

every second that passes by

I can feel a lil part of me is being torn apart.

When I finally start to feel more emotions and do what my heart wants to,

I was scold for being sad and depress,

and was also ask to be resurrected back to my hollow self.

As I know,

emotions are not just happiness, anger and love....

we also have sadness and depression,

now I'm just wearing a mask with a smile,

with this mask,

all I can only feel anger, sadness and depression.

But most of the time,
motionless....
I don't understand the reason you teach us to be real?

If you wanted me to push my emotions aside,

when finally I found the missing parts of heart,

the pieces of happiness, love and joy.....

Emotions helps to create other emotions,

such as happiness will cause sadness,

and the sadness will take time to heal back to happiness,

but you didn't give me the time and just want me to be happy 24hr.

This time I'm not only emotions,

I'm losing me indentity.....

I'm becoming someone who want to pick a fight with anyone.

I'm feeling so torn up!!!

You never knew who I use to be,

So now you will slowly start to see,

The demon sleeping deep inside of me,

Turning me back to who I used to be.

Over You (Love the lyrics)

Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

You took a hammer to these walls,
Dragged the memories down the hall,
Packed your bags and walked away.
There was nothing I could say.
And when you slammed the front door shut,
A lot of others opened up,
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
Well I'm putting my heart back together,
'Cause I got over you.
Well I got over you.
I got over you.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

The Night I look at the stars.

The day before yesterday,

I stay up until 5am,

I was thinking about what to do and started to write some stuff that pop in my head,

I wrotes loads off stuff and only decided to post one now in my blog:

I look into the sky,

and I'll tell you what I see,

stars that looks like your eyes,

and how beautiful they are to me.